On and in food

I love food.

OK, there I said it. I do.

While I envy those friends of mine who do not have a relationship with food, I certainly cannot say the same. many many reasons I can easily blame on my family of origin. I enjoy thinking about what I could make, experiment with tastes and textures. I am by no means a gourmet chef, not even close. I experiment far too much and write down what works far too little. I should say that I am at an 80% success rate.

I used to consider myself pretty non-picky. As a kid I would "eat every bean and pea on my plate" and appreciate my food because there were plenty of "starving kids in Africa" who would love to take my leftovers. (guilt was pervasive!). And would eat everything from hamburger helper to spray cheese to steak to popcorn to veggies. Whatever. its food. I think my entire junior year of high school I ate ice cream for breakfast every day. (and my weight eventually showed that).

Somewhere along the way I guess I have become picky. Not even so much in taste. I have become hyper aware of what my food is and where it comes from. I have learned about the conditions and lack of ethical responsibility in mass meat production. It makes me want to vomit thinking about. And so became a self-proclaimed vegetarian because I had no idea how or where to find ethically farmed/raised meat. I'm really not against eating animals- its the circle of life- animals eat animals- its the quality of life those animals receive. I don't think animals were created for us to abuse. We are stewards. (I could have an entire blog post related to this).

Well, I live closer to the country now. There are farms I can go and visit and see the living conditions of said future meal. And a pig gets to live like a *gasp* pig! Like roll around in mud and eat slop and roam free. This eases my guilty conscience, especially since I really felt it to be important to up my iron and protein once I became pregnant. And it continues. I will eat meat as long as it is "Jenna-approved". otherwise veggies and bread will do just fine. (shout out to Farmer Nick and Lesters Bison Farm and Freedom Acres)

I also married a chemical engineer. And one who now works in the industry of food additives. Therefore, we are also hyper-aware of what ingredients are in all of our pre-packaged food. Pretty much if you can't pronounce it, its probably pretty bad for you. He also gardens. Of course without pesticides.

*So far I sound like I should be about 120 pounds, right. Oh, you can still eat consciously, but a large volume of food. Thats me.*

So this book "7", combined with my already ingrained guilt, animal-loving, married to a chemical engineer self has started to bring my sensitivity to a new heightened level.. Limited my processed foods. Why can't I make stuff like bread, you know like they did in the old days. from scratch. instead of processed store bought. I am really trying not to take this to a scary extreme, (as extremists usually turn me off to whatever their message is) but I am certainly starting to push some limits

(a recent loaf of 100% homemade whole wheat bread)

What limits?
Ok, follow, if you can, my train of thought.

"Ok, so I want to know where my food comes from, right? What about my own kitchen...I can make my own  granola. soup. buns. pizza dough. sauce. pie crust. lemonade. bread? hmmm... (Hatmaker made her own and it was gross according to her...I can make it yummy- of course I can)...bread isn't so bad. I like it...what goes into bread, really? butter. water. yeast. honey. flour. hmmm...can I buy flour local or make my own flour? (research ensues). (I already have some awesome small farm honey) (oh and eggs) how much is a grain grinder?...where do I buy grain?..."

I wish I were kidding.

See the italics above for what I have already made. from scratch. (besides cookies, etc)

Oh man. I now have a long list of things that I want to make myself.  Because I can. At least try to.
- pasta (pasta-maker is now on my Christmas list)
- baby food
- hamburger buns
- cheese (God help me, I bought a cheese-making kit)
- tortillas
- jelly/jam
- vegetable infused things like baked goods

and while its not on the immediate list, I do want to someday try to make beer or wine at home

I think maybe I'm just bored. Or need a project to focus my energy on. I'll probably eventually back off because again, I get bored quickly and easily.

This back to basics food- scratchety-scratch...it seems so "Sally Homemaker"- contrary to my nature. But it feels more pushing against the "ease" of everything society tries to make seem normal.

I'm attempting the hamburger buns for a girls weekend this weekend. If they turn out poor, I can always pick up some Wildflour bakery goods at the farmers marker. When I pick up my "Jenna-approved" beef for the burgers.

God, I am a hippy, aren't I.